Asiaphiles anonymous
Amanda Berg, staff writer
April 25, 2007

Is it reasonable to think that few people will limit their dating field based on race anymore? And, if one does, is it because of personal preferences of physical appearance or is it because of the stereotypes associated with a particular race?

I believe that there is an underlying racism within some people’s attraction to Asian women. It is based on presumptuous and, many times, insulting stereotypes.

I asked several peers what generalizations came to mind when they thought of Asian women. I received responses mostly centered on sexuality, though the comments were at two extremes. Some saw Asian women as brazenly sexual, domineering porn stars with insatiable sexual drives. Many others viewed them as demure, submissive masseuses or geisha-esque sexual servants.

However, when I asked for their generalizations of Asian men, there was a glaring contrast with their ideas of Asian women. Asian men were seen as decidedly nonsexual, almost to the point of being neutered. Stereotypes mostly centered on physical features such as height and endowment. Whereas Asian women were pictured positively as very feminine and childlike, men were negatively described with traits opposing the masculine ideal.

For many Asian women, interracial dating has become an uncomfortable pursuance from those affected by “yellow fever,” or white men fetishizing Asian females, also called “rice lovers” and “asiaphiles.” After encountering many of these men, I’ve developed an intense aversion to guys who are attracted to me strictly because of my short stature, almond-shaped eyes, or long dark hair; guys who repeatedly ask me questions about my heritage such as what kind of Asian I am or if I know how to cook Korean food; and guys who mention that they only date Asian women.

There are ridiculous double standards set in place. Whereas it would be considered strange to ask a white woman what European country she was from, or what language she spoke, asking an Asian woman similar questions are generally opening lines.

This isn’t to say I refuse to date non-Asians. It would be ludicrous for me to limit myself in that way. This also is not to say that any white man who happens to be attracted to an Asian woman would think or behave this way. I just believe it’s time for some people to check themselves and consider why it is they are attracted to one race or another, and then reconsider the stereotypes they help to perpetuate.

Amanda Berg is a staff writer for AsiaXpress.com. Amanda can be reached at Amanda.Berg@asiaxpress.com.